Ridiculous Qs: Would You Do This for the Perfect Body?

I’m not sure if this is going to translate well to a blogging format.

I’m giving it a whirl anyway.

On Valentine’s Day, Josh and I spent about an hour going through Chuck Klosterman’s HYPERtheticals: Questions for Insane Conversations. They’re a set of cards which lay out crazy scenarios, asking what you would do if you were in said situation. HIGHLY recommended purchase for any kind of vacation (especially a road trip!) or when you have friends/family over. Example:

“You are offered a Brain Pill that will make you 10 percent more intelligent, but will make you seem 20 percent less intelligent to everyone else. Do you take this pill?”

— Chuck Klosterman, HYPERtheticals

Josh said yes, without question.

He thinks he’d be happier if he could feel smarter/more confident in all of his decision making. I, on the other hand, said no way. Who wants to be 10 percent smarter if no one takes you seriously? Would your extra smarts even matter? I think I’ll stay right where I am, thank you very much.

Next, we tried to come up with our own questions.

It was difficult to match Klosterman’s wit & general insanity, but hey, we’re new at this. Plus he’s Chuck Klosterman for cryin out loud! At any rate, I’m throwing out our first question:

“You encounter a wizard. This wizard makes you an incredible offer: He’ll grant you your version of the perfect body. As a woman, that might mean curves like Sophia Vergara or abs like Jennifer Aniston. Guys, maybe that means you wake up looking like Joe Manganiello. Whatever fits your idea of perfect, you get that. You will never need to watch what you eat or how you exercise ever again. You’ll look to be in ‘perfect’ shape forever. The catch? Your permanent strength & coordination will be that of an average six-year-old.

Would you take the wizard up on his offer?”

Please share you answer in the comments (and answer the intelligence question too if ya want)! Have your own ridiculous question? Email it to heyeleanorproject@gmail.com.


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Comments (13)

  • Lluviata 6 years ago Reply

    Asking each other questions is a trend that’s circling around right now. A few weeks ago, I was asking and answering questions from the "how to fall in love with a stranger "list.
    Regarding the body change, I would absolutely not take that offer. Feeling strong is very important to me. Now, if the offer were: gain world-class strength and coordination but an undesirable body. . . I might take the offer!

    molly mogren katt 6 years ago Reply

    Ooooh! I like how you turned the question around!

    I think one of the challenging parts of answering this question is coming to terms with your vanity. I don’t think I would opt for the "perfect" body if it meant I couldn’t lift a gallon of milk! However, I also don’t think I’d be cool with an undesireable body that’s really strong. I think I’ll just stick with what nature gave me.

  • Lee Davenport 6 years ago Reply

    I am not willing to change anything about myself for a trade-off that is permanent. I may not be perfect but at least I have the hope of things about myself!

    molly mogren katt 6 years ago Reply

    Lee, you are perfect to me. And probably stronger than a 6-year-old 🙂

  • Maggie 6 years ago Reply

    Nope. If I wanted that body, I would work for it – and get super strong and coordinated in the process!

    Also: six-pack abs and a J-Lo booty aren’t very sexy on someone who has a six-year-old’s ability (or lack thereof) to hold a pencil or fork. Like, hey, nice butt, but you need help tying your shoes and cutting your meat? And what do you mean you can’t lift a gallon jug of milk with those biceps?

    molly mogren katt 6 years ago Reply

    I think explaining why you couldn’t do anything would probably get exhausting. I hadn’t even thought of the writing… like you’d be really H-O-T, but your writing would be all weird.

  • Shash 6 years ago Reply

    Absolutely not to the body question. The brain question depends on your social needs.

  • josh 6 years ago Reply

    OK, I agree that I wouldn’t take this wizard dude up on his offer, but I’d at least think about it… I mean, if I could be that studdly, couldn’t I turn that into some serious cash? Modeling, acting, some deuce bigalow action, I don’t know. If that’s the case, I could just pay people to to tie my shoes and cut my meat. Just sayin’…

    molly mogren katt 6 years ago Reply

    I like how you think… except for the Deuce Bigelow part.

  • Ashley 6 years ago Reply

    I’m with you on the intelligence question – no thanks!

    The body question had me tempted since I feel like I already have the coordination of a 6 year old (seriously, I’m the clumsiest person ever), but I’m definitely stronger than one, so I’ll have to say no to that too. Sorry, body, no Sophia Vergara curves for you.

  • mle 6 years ago Reply

    I say yes, I woukd take the wizard up on his offer. I think the average 6 year old is coordinated enough for my day to day life and I am already probably already the same strength 😬. Great hypothetical!

    molly mogren katt 6 years ago Reply

    Love your honesty! And I’ve seen six year olds do amazing things… even average ones.

  • Craig 5 years ago Reply

    I would not take the pill. I figure that others perceptions of my intelligence influences how well I can work on a team of people. The benefits of working well as a group out weigh the personal bump in intelligence.

    The wizard… It would be tempting. I would need to really investigate 6 year olds. I would think there are lots of things that 6 year olds could learn to do (tie shoes, write neatly) with practice. I’d really need to figure out how severe those limitations are.

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