I know people are obsessed with salty, pickled things. Me, not so much. “Learn to like olives” was my New Year’s resolution in 2009, and only after eating them 15+ times (I’m talking from good restaurants & olive bars, NOT those O-shaped grody black olives that are ubiquitous at taco bars across the country… those things are disgusting!), I finally got on board with most olives. I’m a salty-sweet person, not a salty-salty-vinegary person (exception: salt & vinegar chips).
So, capers. People love them. I tolerate them mixed in things. Much like anchovies and soy sauce, they add a nice punch of flavor. However, as a solo ingredient or player on a mostly blank canvass, capers can suck it. What are capers anyhow?!
Yesterday I found myself at a bagel establishment, looking for lunch. I went for the smoked salmon sandwich, which came with salmon (obviously. Yum!), cream cheese (yes please!), red onions (yuck!), tomatoes (blech!) and capers (ew!). I simply do not trust the freshness of onions in a chain restaurant, plus they give me heartburn. Skip! Tomatoes are only worth eating raw in the summertime, and even then, I am very picky about them. Bye-bye, tomatoes. But the capers… I had no good excuse for skipping those, other than that I never had ordered them on something on purpose, and thus, skipping those was simply a habit. So, I left the capers and added cucumber and lettuce. Now that’s a smoked salmon sandwich!
I returned to my office, caper-salmon bagel in hand. I unwrapped it and examined the sandwich. Then, I took a big bite. You know what? I still don’t really like capers. But at least I tried.